The Design Twins | DIY Home Decor Inspiration Blog

Inspiring your best life. Twin sisters blogging about home decor, design and inspiration.

Don’t Worry Be Happy!

stop worrying start living

The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.

 ~ John Milton

We all have those days when nothing, and I mean nothing, seems to go right!  You wake up “on the wrong side of the bed” and it’s downhill from there.  You get some negative thought in that brain of yours, and the next thing you know you stub your toe!  And it hurts!  So now you’re cursing to yourself…stumbling to try to get refocused on your day.  Your toe is still throbbing, and you’re mad at yourself for being so clumsy, and mad at the day for….whatever.  The point is you are traveling down a road of negativity and it’s fueling itself, gaining momentum as you go!  If you don’t stop this train it’s going to pick up passengers (more negativity) all day long, and you better get ready, because you’re in for a tough one if you don’t stop it!

But how?  How do you stop it?  The train is rolling fast…how can you just jump off?  Pull the emergency stop cord and STOP THAT TRAIN!!  Don’t wait for the next scheduled station!

Stop the Negativity Train

Step One:  Realize you are on it!

Gosh this may sound super obvious, but to many of us it is not!  Shockingly.  We think that there actually is a “wrong side of the bed”.  Um, nope!  That’s made up.  OK, I’m laughing now, but seriously, some people actually get caught in the trap of thinking that a bad mood has set upon them and they are at the mercy of it…like they have no choice but to ride the mood until it wears off.  Nonsense!

So the first step is to realize you are headed down the negativity path (however you want to see it) and that you don’t need to stay on it!

Step Two:  Jump Off!

This also may seem obvious, but how many times have you found yourself either too angry or too unhappy to even realize that you can stop going in this direction?  When we are caught up in our own world of emotions, regardless of the cause, often we can’t see past.  (By the way, it’s ALL in our heads).  What is in our heads creates our reality.  So if you are thinking negative thoughts pretty soon your reality starts imitating your inner world.

Jump off!!  As if your life depended on it!  No wallowing!

For example, almost every time I hurt myself I am in a bad mood (not the other way around).  If you start paying attention to this phenomenon you too will be amazed.  It happens when I’m impatient, frustrated, flustered, unhappy…these are the emotions that proceed an injury for me…almost every time!! Crazy!

How you jump off is up to you, but here are some of my favorites.

Stop worrying live your best life

How to Jump Off the Negativity Train

  1. Stop and say a prayer
  2. Meditate
  3. Exercise
  4. Make a mental or written gratitude list
  5. Put a smile on your face AND FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT
  6. Get out of yourself and help someone else

These are all practical action-oriented steps that give you back control.  They help you step back from the emotional, irrational mood being in control of your day and taking back THE MOMENT!

Take Back Control of Your Mind!

When you let your mind control you all kinds of things happen, most of them NOT GOOD!  You need to control your mind.  When you let your mind control you most often you are in the past or in the future.

 If you are depressed you are living in the past.

If you are anxious you are living in the future.

If you are at peace you are living in the present.

~ Lao Tzu

When your mind is in the past you engage in these negative activities:

  • replaying negative conversations
  • replaying hurtful moments, subconsciously or consciously
  • analyzing the past
  • second-guessing your decisions
  • wondering “what-ifs”
  • letting doubt rule your world
  • inhibiting progress
  • inhibiting decisiveness
  • wasting energy
  • wasting time

When you are in the future you are often engaged in these negative activities:

  • worry
  • anxiety about outcomes over which you have no control
  • allowing fear to take over
  • imagined fears
  • stopping forward progress

This is all self-sabotage.  Not only is this sapping your current energy, it is creating  a negative reality.  Worry is a wasted activity.  Can I please say this again?  Worry is a waste!  There is NOTHING productive about worry.

Why We Worry

Besides it being an unconscious habit some people worry because they actually believe it serves a purpose!  Some believe:

a) it’s your “job”.  You may even believe that worrying shows you’re a caring and conscientious person.

b) worrying helps you avoid bad things, prepare for the worst, or come up with solutions.

Negative beliefs, or worrying about worrying, further add to anxiety and keep it going (much in the same way worrying about getting to sleep often keeps you awake).

But positive beliefs about worrying can be even more damaging. It’s tough to break the worry habit if you believe that your worrying protects you.  In order to stop worry and anxiety for good, you must give up your belief that worrying serves a positive purpose. Once you realize that worrying is the problem, not the solution, you can regain control of your worried mind.

stop worrying find happiness

WORRY IS A TOTAL WASTE!!!

It is a waste of your power, a waste of your energy, a waste of your time.  We are creatures of habit.  Habits are hard to break, but they are not impossible.  You need to reprogram your thinking, but it can change your whole life.  Wouldn’t it be worth trying if your whole life could improve??  I think it is.  How can you stop?

  1. Practice being aware that you are in a state of worry.  Awareness is the first step.
  2. Next, realize this fundamental truth:  that it is a pure waste of your time.  Worrying will not help you or the situation.  It will ONLY hurt you.
  3. Let go.  This is where the phrase “Let Go & Let God” comes from.  No matter what we do, we are not in control of the universe!  We are not God!  Why do we try to think we can control the universe?  It’s just crazy!  It is a waste of our energy when we try to control what we can’t.  We could be using our energy controlling what we can…ourselves!
  4. Then, redirect.  Take back control of your mind.  This is where meditation is SO helpful.  Get back to the here and now.  Take back your power and be present.
  5. Use your energy and presence to do good.  Be present for the people around you, for family, even strangers.  You will immediately feel a difference and begin to reap the rewards of redirecting your energy to the moment you are living.
  6. Finally, remember to practice these steps daily.  You will continually improve.

The Power of Now

To help you with this all-important awareness and ability I highly suggest you read (or reread) the book by Eckhart Tolle “The Power of Now” .  I read this about 5 years ago, and it changed my thinking tremendously.  It is definitely a book that should be regularly revisited so I’m getting ready to reread it.

Now that I start my days with “The Miracle Morning” (click here to read the blog post about how this book changed my life, ‘6 Simple Habits to Change Your Life‘) I actually have time to read again.  Ever since I started Instagram as my “hobby” it replaced my free time that I used to set aside for reading.  I have recently realized that we have time for exactly what we make time for.  In other words, saying we don’t have time for something is a thinly veiled excuse.  If we really wanted to do it, we would MAKE time to do it!  I’m starting to see right through my excuses and recognize them for what they are…excuses!  It’s amazing how we think we’re fooling ourselves.  In reality we are making choices and prioritizing all day long.

A Final Reminder

When life is going well it is so easy to be happy.  We get complacent and think we’ve got this thing called life down pat.  We’ve got it going on.  But as soon as things go wrong, which they eventually do, we falter.  We need to have the tools and the mindset to realize that wallowing in self-pity is no way to respond to life’s challenges.

 Take responsibility for your  own happiness!

Nothing can bring you happiness but yourself.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

With love, gratitude and well wishes,

Julie & Jodie

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Comments

  1. I am definitely guilty of several things you have listed in this blog post! I definitely tend to live in the past or in the future and have struggled with living in the moment, in the present. I like your ideas of dealing with worry and how to jump off the negativity train, both areas I need to focus more on dealing with.

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    • Such words of wisdom! I really need to ponder this right now in my life. I have a few things they are weighing heavy on my heart. Thank you ladies, for such inspiration and positivity. March madness ????

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  2. I’m not sure you girls get any rest.
    You always amaze me with your blog posts. The tools that you provide to us are an asset that we can return to over and over again. Thanks again for your powerful messages to help us better ourselves. God bless you Julie and Jodie. ????????

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  3. Yep! Another great post, you girls are on it! I love your blog for so many reasons❤️ You girls are honest and straight forward with your information and I sightis on both life and decorating! How much more could q person ask for in March Madness! ????????
    thank you, Patti

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  6. It’s okay to be in a bad mood now and again but realizing it and making a cognitive note to change your mood is better. Let the endorphins shine with a little exercise. Laugh a little as a smile goes a long way, and if all else fails, know that tomorrow is a fresh start.

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  7. Thanks for your encouraging posts. “As a man thinks in his heart so is he” Proverbs 23:7
    March Madness.

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  8. What a wonderful inspirational message to wake up to on the March. Madness Saturday! Every morning I have a window of time that I read and pray! This made my day. Thank you for sharing!

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  9. Hi Twinnies!

    This is by far my favorite post!

    People have never understood my peaceful nature during rough times when I was a single mom raising 4 daughters. As an RN, many coworkers and patients families cannot understand my patience when things are hectic. The truth is I cannot I cannot concentrate if I’m busy worrying. My faith has guided and protected me through tough times.

    The only time I allow myself to worry is when my patients are really ill, it’s my responsibility for their life and I am the one that reports to the doctor if there are changes in condition. That is just something that comes with job and I will not change that worry.

    There is so much to be grateful for…

    Have a great weekend!

    March Madness

    Sandy

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  10. I am a firm believer in taking responsibility for your own hapiness. No one makes you happy.. You control that completely. Loved reading your thoughts on “worry” . Totally agree with it – now just need to do it! Haha ! Thanks so much!

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  12. Oh how I needed to hear this and be reminded that “we ourselves are responsible for our own happiness “.
    Lately my husband and I have had some difficult times financially. ( he lost his job last July) things have been tough but my faith in God has helped us get through these trials and I’m reminded daily that he loves me and wants me to be happy! You girls are amazing and I’m grateful that I found yall on IG! ????????????thank you!!!????????

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  13. I wake up in the morning saying to myself I’m going to be a nicer person, treat everyone, including my husband, the man I adore, like I want to be treated. I’m going to act like this is my last day on Earth. I don’t know what happens, but I hear my old self coming out, and I start my day over. We can all do that. I then say, “From now on, from this moment, I am going to treat everyone kindly.” I absolutely love the fact that I get another chance at this! Some days I start my day over 5 to 10 times.

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  14. Great blog! The part about the fact that we have time for what we really want to do hit a chord with me. Thank you!!!

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  15. Great words to think about. I am trying to change everyday with your help. Thank you. March madness.

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  16. Good morning, you two! Since it’s March and since I’ve already been a recipient of your generosity this month, I’ve been reading your posts, enjoying them, and sitting quietly while letting others comment. (Silly, right?) Anyway, I HAD to share that this is my favorite post to date – and that’s saying a lot! I’m reading The Miracle Morning. I’ve got a copy of You’re a Badass … to start next. Now, it looks like I have a new book to read. The words in this post are so spot-on. Oh, my gosh, when you stop to think about how much control we really have over negative thoughts and feelings, who would not want to practice simple little things to change that mindset?! I am thankful every single day for having found you both! Thank you for your continuing inspiration.

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  17. Spot on as always! It’s hard to remember this sometimes, but we were meant to live without worry!

    March Madness

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  18. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! Needed this today! I have been fretting lately about my Dad, as he been unwell for quite some time. This blog post was exactly what I needed. Bless you two.

    ❤????????????❤️

    Jill

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  19. I’m so happy i found your blog This is a post i really needed, I am sure I will read it again. THANK U❤❤❤ MARCH MADNESS.

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  20. Let go and let God has definitely been my mantra lately. When I say that to myself in a moment of angst or worry, a feeling of peace washes over me. I think meditation would be a great way to keep that inner peace. I enjoyed the times when I meditated and have fallen victim to the “I don’t have enough time” to fit it in my day. You ladies always hit it right on the head with how so many of us women feel in our lives. You really are doing great things with your blog. Connecting us together and saying we can all do this!!!!

    ????????????????????

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  21. I stress over everything. However, I am on a journey of self care…starting a month long challenge in April, looking forward to it and trying hard to breath and let go of the things I don’t have control of!!! Thanks for an amazing post.

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  22. Fantastic post! So many good things you shared. I really liked these 2 sentences…. “What is in our heads creates our reality. So if you are thinking negative thoughts pretty soon your reality starts imitating your inner world.”

    Really if we would just do what the Bible says, it would take care of the negative mindset. Phillipians 4:8 says, Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

    Thanks for the good food for thought!

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  23. I love all your posts but this one is my favorite!! Amen and amen to all of it! Happy Happy Don’t Worry Be Happy Saturday!! ????????????

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  25. The timing on this post could not have been more perfect. Such an inspirational message to get focused for the weekend. Thanks for the beautiful message. Have a fabulous weekend. March Madness! ????????

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    • How exciting Lisa! We would be honored!! Spread the positivity and shine His light! How wonderful. So happy to be connected and thrilled that you were inspired here. With love, Julie & Jodie

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  27. Julie and Jodie, This is so true and such great advice… we do have the power to change our thinking, and chose to dwell on the positive instead of the negative. We all get the same 24 hours in a day we chose what’s important to us in our spare time. Thank you girls for choosing to write such an encouraging blog.
    Your friend, Patti

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  30. Thank you for this encouraging and inspirational post !! I have a daily struggle to “let go and let God” but I perservere and pray ???? Thank you !! March Madness!

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  31. ????March Madness???? I love the phrase , Get Off the Train , in terms of negativity! It will be easy to remember that and apply quickly when our minds keep us on the down slope … thank you , Debbie

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  32. What a great read and perfect timing. I’m pulling the cord! It’s been a rough 2 years with my hubs freaking with early stage 4 lung cancer (cancer free and no, never smoked). I read this article to him and took a screenshot of 6 items. However, we do pray often. But this was a bit of a push and we needed it! So, the train stops here, we’re getting off. Thank you for such an inspiring post. Xo

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  33. Thank you SO much for these words of wisdom! I know I will return to this post time and time again, since I definitely have a tendency to worry. I really appreciate your insights — best part of March Madness!

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  34. As always, such wisdom and good advice that you ladies share in your blog posts; thank you! I really love the “let go and let God!” I am thankful for you both!❤️❤️????????

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  35. our minds are so powerful and capable of changing the direction we are headed in. ‘The Secret’ is also a great book/movie to boost your attitude in the right direction.

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  36. Julie and Jodie,
    I am meeting a former coworker today who is struggling with some negative thoughts. I am going to share this post with her and try and be a positive role model for her today and always. This blog post couldn’t have come at a better time. God bless you both. ❤

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  37. Thank you so very much for the time and effort you’ve put into this! I needed to hear this, my mum has had brain surgery this past Thursday and while mum and dad were in another state going through this, I found out my sister is in jail!!! To say that I’ve spent this past few days worrying,overthinking and praying would be a huge understatement. So again thank you and God bless you both. Also I love your Insta stories ???????????? Helen sherriff Tasmania Australia

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  38. Julie and Jodie … best post ever! Love how you started off with the quote from Milton. I am the world’s biggest worrier and so your comments on worrying being a waste if time really hit home for me. I must work on not letting worrying control my life. March madness! Our Jayhawks fell to Oregon last nite but life marches on!

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  39. Oh my goodness! I LOVE this post and I NEEDED this post, Thank you from the bottom of my heart! I recently found you from IG and have truly enjoyed getting to ‘know’ you both. Thank you for your honesty and transparency in all that you do. It’s not all about pretty pictures and in my opinion, you both do a wonderful job of finding that balance. Have a wonderful day and woo-hoo for March Madness! ???? ????????

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    • Laurie, Thank you SO much for that sincere wonderful response! It is not just about the pretty pictures! And Jodie and I are about so much more than “pretty pictures”…that’s why we are here. Honestly, we feel called by God and our higher purpose on earth to reach into people’s hearts and lives and touch them…in deeper ways than simply home decor inspiration. While we love, love, love home decor and having fun creating beautiful spaces in which to enjoy our lives and families, we don’t end there! We hope you will continue to enjoy our blog. We have so much more to come. With love & blessings, Julie & Jodie

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  40. I should have read this Friday lol what wonderful post!! I will be keeping this in mind next time I get in a funk. Thank you!
    March madness

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  43. I enjoy reading your blog for the encouraging posts…they always make my day a little brighter. I live the shop section also. I ordered the pouf and I love it!!!!

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  45. Boy did I need this post today…..I need to go back and read it again till I get out of this mood today ????Thanks for sharing….March Madness

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  48. While reading this post, I was convicted of a lot!! I can think of numerous times where I have let one bad thing lead to another and the day is ruined (in my mind). And it is so hard to not only recognize it, but jump off that train. I also worry too much actually like you said worrying any amount is too much. I try to remember Philippians 4:5-7. “Do not worry about ANYTHING, but in everything through prayer and petition with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” All these things are easier said than done, but I think it necessary to not just practice them, but make it a lifestyle. I do appreciate the topics and content you write about. So relevant and so needed.

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  51. Jodie,
    I saw you patching holes and repainting on IG…can you show us how to patch up nail holes?
    March Madness

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  53. Julie and Jodie,
    So I met with my former coworker today and had a good hearted talk. Sometimes things make since when you hear it from someone else. I showed my support, confidence and love to her. Gave her ideas of how to let go and be happy. This blog post poured out of me today and into her heart. I am so grateful to you both for posting this at THE right moment. God bless you girls. ❤

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  54. Jodie,
    Can’t wait to see your navy wall. The suspense is getting to me. It’s going to be so dramatic. I hope it’s reveal day tomorrow. ????????

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  55. In a bible study by Beth Moore, she said “God can not only change your life, but He can change your day.” I cling to this truth on bad days. And I raid my stash of hidden chocolate. 😉 Another encouraging post. xoxo

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  58. This is definitely a God-send for me this morning! He knew I needed to read your powerful message, so He made me sit down ( after I stubbed my toe!????) I struggle with worry daily, to no good avail. Thank you for your heartfelt, helpful, honest posts! You girls have inspired me and all who follow you, more than you’ll ever know! Love and blessings today and always! ????????????????????????. Jan, HomeGirls Design

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    • Jan, You just made my day! This post was written for you and God most certainly planned it. I hope you will read it again and again and continue on this path of growth…reminding yourself to stay in your power. Do not give it away! Keep it and use it to spread all the joy and beauty that God gave you. It is silly and selfish and a waste to worry! Give that glory that God created in you back to the world…each and every day. Many blessings to you, Dear Friend, with love & gratitude, Julie & Jodie

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  61. I completely agree with everything
    you said! We DO have the power to change our thoughts. It is so important to maintain a positive outlook and create a peaceful atmosphere around yourself.

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  62. Thank you for always reminding us to focus on the good stuff, staying positive is so important in life. I love following your feeds and blogs, it’s always uplifting and brings a smile to my face! I love decorating and adding happiness to my home and seeing the joy you both get from all of that inspired me to start my own IG decor account. It’s only days old but I love it and it makes me smile every single day, so thank you both for that!!! ???????? (march madness) ????????

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  63. Wow!!!! How inspiring are you!! My mom’s favorite saying is “let go and let God” I try to live by that every single day. Seeing and reading this made me feel at such ease..
    And love the Lao Tzu quote!!
    God Bless and yes stop and pray always????

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  64. This is spring break week for 2 of my grandchildren. My dear daughter-in-law asked me to go with her & the kids to Florida. So I’m in sunny Florida, having a fantastic time.
    I’m not getting time to read your blogs in depth. But from what I’ve seen and read today I can see your giving your readers nuggets of wisdom. Carry on with March Madness, and enjoy these special moments. ❤????

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  68. Thanks for the inspiration and encouragement, girls! As always ☺️ It was food for thought and honestly was a reality check about how I handle situations at my job sometimes. Ps: I loved the quote! March Madness

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  71. I have to say – I started reading your blog for the DIY posts but love all of the posts about being positive. Especially due to the bad weather these days. Thank you both. (Also I love that laundry sign on Julie’s instagram story. You definitely deserve more than just signs for all the work you do but they are gorgeous!)

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  72. Just wanted to leave you with a quote. “Worry robs today of its strength.” Isn’t this so true? Also I can’t believe March is almost over! ???? Fingers crossed about this giveaway. So many amazing prizes ????????

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  73. You girls make my day. ???? I’m glad you can laugh at yourself and carry on. ???? Don’t worry, be happy. ???? When you laugh, I’m laughing with you. ???? I just truly enjoy everything about who you are. God bless you both ????????

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  74. Wise words!! This was a great reminder for me. I would refer back tho this when I have one of those bad days! March madness

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  75. This post was probably written for me!! 2 weeks ago the ice maker in our fairly new fridge was leaking, apparently, pretty bad. The water was going under the wood and we didn’t notice it in time. I worried about our new floors and baseboards. I worried about mold. I worried about the cost! I was a worrying mess. It was senseless because not only did our homeowners cover everything but the company they sent out, painted our whole house, stored all of my furniture during the clean up and reinstall. They sent a cleaning crew to clean my house top to bottom and brought all of my stuff back in, polished all the furniture and set it back in place. We have faux wood tile now and it all looks beautiful. Half way through the process I had to , “let go, and let God. It really does work!! It frees you of any stress. Ultimately, He is always in control!

    This post is perfect and so true! Thanks for the reminder. ????

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    • Cathy, As you can see and know, all things, even the challenges, are for His Purposes! Well done and great share. Love hearing this story and love your kindness always. Our journey is more full because you are on it with us. Praise God! With love & gratitude, Julie & Jodie

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  76. The bad mood trap is so easy to fall in and then start piling things on top of it. Sometimes we seem to think we owe it to ourselves to have a crabby day; but when our attitudes infect those around us it’s not healthy! I try to get a hold of whatever is getting under my skin right away and Give it to God….many times I can’t even remember what started the bad day in the first place. Thank you for your wisdom and reminders that we have the power to choose our mood. Keep it up girls, love all your posts! ????❤????

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  77. Oh how I need this right now! I’m continuously amazed by the way God speaks through you sweet sisters…to move you to write and advise so many people who need just the inspired guidance you’re serving up! Thank you for the enthusiasm you shower us with in ways we can’t list…and mostly, thanks for your obedience in loving your neighbor as yourself. That trait seems lost at times and you provide a breath of fresh air and love! You bring me great joy. May you feel His arms around you urging you to keep listening and then obeying! Fasten you seat belts my friends! You’re on the ride of your life.

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    • Julie, Your words inspire ME! What a joy to read your reply this morning. God speaks through those of us who listen! Thank you for blessing us today with your love & appreciation. It fills us up so we can continue to give as we are called to do! With great gratitude & love, Julie & Jodie

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  80. I love the fake it till you make it! This is such a great post! You ladies are so good at this.
    March madness

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  81. Thanks for the insight. I have a lot of anxiety but have tried to overcome it this past year by letting go of things i can’t control. These are awesome tips. Your smiles in your Instagram stories is inspring.
    #marchmadness

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  82. I definitely have the worry gene ????????. I struggle with it at times. Yes agree justification of worrying was something I did. Then I had remembered the – bible verse. – Be anxious for nothing – meaning. Don’t worry ! Also in James we are to count it all joy in our trials. Basically – going to God with all issues. So – I don’t worry like I use to. I let it go and let God like you said. Doesn’t mean I don’t have bad days but I am able to bring myself out of the funk much faster – thank you for the reminder and tools that will help. I intend to use these – print them out. You two are amazing and such a blessing. March Madness

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  85. This is a great post that hits some nails on the head! When I start to worry what’s helps me the most is to listen to worship music, read my bible and write in my prayer journal.. just laying it all out and leaving it there. God is so much more capable to handle it than me ???? March madness ????

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  86. I’ve been watching your Instagram stories all month and so enjoy them. I read all your posts but don’t always comment and I really should. Thanks for being an inspiration

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  88. Love this!! Especially in the beginning that “worry is a waste of time”. This is great. Thank you!
    March Madness

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  89. Y’all are truly an inspiration. Great words of wisdom. It’s all about attitude and choices. Keep up the good work and God bless you both.
    March Madness

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  91. This post is soooo good!???? I love your list of ways to “jump off of the negativity train!” Stopping to pray always helps me to reset and examine my heart and to remember that He is overall! I appreciate you ladies and the many ways that you minister to those around you! Thank you!!????????????????

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  92. Growing up my mom had a friend who knew how to make those chunky baskets. My mom bought one from her and used it as a vessel for a box of tissues… I think I may have to get one because it brings fond memories. March Madness!

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  95. Happy Final Days to March Madness!!! Thank you for sharing the love with your Canadian Friends????????❤????????

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